It’s Okay To Be Imperfect

July 30, 2018 by journeyintolight

Are you a perfectionist? Being deliberately bad at a number of things fooled me into thinking I wasn’t. But that was only so I could have the energy to be a perfectionist at what was important to me.

Things like my spiritual maturity, being a husband and father, and my ministry have been the focus with some success. But it’s never enough. Being a good father seemed to morph into being a perfect one. Being productive in ministry increased to being even more fruitful. Good was not good enough.

When I graduated from seminary eight years ago I envisioned myself as a Movement leader. Unless God used me to turn the hearts and minds of hundreds or even thousands toward the deeper spiritual walk I had experienced in seminary, I was falling short. This was perfectionism in action.

I am slowly learning to be content with fulfilling the roles that God has assigned for me, even if it feels like a third of a loaf instead of a whole one. Each new project is now carefully evaluated  to insure it comes from God. Seeking to be perfect in my eyes is a waste of time because it is unnecessary, for God has already said to each of us, “You are precious to me. You are honored, and I love you” (Isaiah 43:4, NLT). By accomplishing more, we will never be valued or loved more than we are today.

image.png

Many of us are taught to aim high and if we fall short, we still have accomplished a lot. But failure can cause discontent and the fear of trying. Several times in my career I have accepted jobs that were over-my-head and suffered the pain of failure. It helps us to remember our importance does not depend on how impressive the job we hold is to us or others but on it being God’s assignment.

I recently decided to stay involved in a ministry that was only doing a fraction of what I hoped it’s impact would be some day. I wanted to accomplish a fuller impact sooner. But God usually doesn’t work that way. It’s “little by little” and “step by step. ”A hard worker has plenty of food, but a person who chases fantasies has no sense” (Proverbs 12:11, NLT). Let us lay aside our fantasies and follow God in pursuit of his ministry.

Ninety-two percent of New Year’s resolutions fail. Perfectionism often drives us to make unrealistic goals and when we fail, we give up. We never think of  cutting our goals in half.

Let us be content with who we are and what we do. After trusting God for his power and doing our best, may we rest in who we are to God. We need to let go of trying to earn importance and approval from God and others by being perfect.

We are already important and approved of by him. We have a perfect standing with him. Let’s look forward to the day in heaven when our performance will be perfect as well. In the meantime, we are still important, accepted, and loved by God, despite being imperfect.

 

 

Posted in Worth | 2 Comments »

The Problem with Suffering

July 20, 2018 by journeyintolight

We all suffer. It’s amazing the variety of ways we do. Backaches, heartbreaks, and pressures to perform are common sources of our pain.

image.png

Suffering is made easier when it has meaning. Most of my periods of pain as adult do have meaning. I can look back and see some of what God was doing in the situations. However, I still struggle to understand what God was doing through my difficult childhood. But that’s okay. I accept there were reasons the suffering took place.

Sometimes others don’t seem to be struggling that much. But my confidence is God has worked together  difficulties to make me more like himself in ways that would never have happened in easier times.

If we are Christians, we know God loves and watches over us. Yet, we suffer. How do we explain that? There are a number of possibilities. God is a loving father and disciplines us so we will grow more like him. This process often is painful as he allows us to suffer the consequences of failing to live life his way.

Pain comes because we live in a fallen world. How could it be otherwise? We can’t expect this to be a “heaven on earth” experience when our world is in rebellion against God.

He allows suffering so we can experience his comfort and encouragement. This develops our dependence on him and deepens our intimacy. Pain makes us desperate and more inclined to throw ourselves on his mercy, otherwise, we prefer to rely on ourselves. But it’s in our struggles we recognize our weakness and grow strong in the Lord. “For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:10).

The difficulties encourage me to look forward to heaven where there will be no pain. “He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever” (Revelation 21:4, NLT).As long as we are here, we are promised trouble (Job 5:7).

Regardless of the good reasons to suffer, I don’t like it. Many times, my choice would be comfort over difficult growth.

How do we please the Lord in our pain? What does godliness look like?

Joseph was shipped off to a foreign land as a slave by his jealous brothers. He was put into prison when he was falsely accused of wrong-doing. Yet, he served his masters well, saw God in his circumstances and did not become bitter by his harsh treatment. He saw God’s good purposes in his circumstances. “You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good” (Genesis 50:20, NLT). Like Joseph, we need to develop God’s perspective on pain by applying scripture to our suffering.

We may feel God doesn’t love us much when we are going through hard times. But he does. Pain can deceive us. God promises us that hard times will never mean he has stopped loving us (1 Peter 5:10).

Several years ago, I went through a period of intense chronic pain. I was confused and didn’t know what to do. In my darkness, I focused on doing the responsible thing in God’s eyes, regardless of the pain. This helped me to face my fears instead of running from them. I learned avoiding trials was not always the responsible thing to do. The commitment to do the responsible thing despite pain was the light God used to lead me out of the darkness.

May God give us his perspective on pain- it’s for a purpose, it’s for our good, and he will help us through it. Let’s give thanks for what he is doing through our suffering today.

 

 

 

Posted in Trials | Leave a Comment »

Wounded But Not Crippled

July 9, 2018 by journeyintolight

We all are wounded by life. These wounds can cripple us or we can grow stronger through confronting the fears and distorted thinking behind them that threaten to keep us from becoming the healthy people God designed us to be.

My scars have slowed me down. I came from an abusive, Non-Christian home which left me with considerable distorted thinking. What people thought of me was who I was. My worth was determined by my achievements. It wasn’t okay to be me.

These false beliefs could have crippled me if not confronted and transformed by God’s power. By confronting them, I have gradually realized what people think is not as important as on what God thinks of me. Achievements don’t increase my importance which helps me relax more in being precious to God.  And it’s okay to be me. My passions, interests, and desires need to be lived out in God’s power to become the person he created me to be.

People who are learning to overcome their wounds are setting aside the crippling thoughts, beliefs and practices from their pasts and embracing God’s liberating truths.

One of my ministries is mentoring medical students in how to integrate their faith with their future medical practices. But many of them have been wounded which has led them to become addicted to pornography. This addiction can cripple them and rob them of a fulfilling life. But they can also fight back against their wounds and cooperate with God in their healing. Many of them are joining support groups for encouragement and accountability in this area.

Too often we tolerate our wounds. We get used to living in a sick reality because it makes us feel safer. But God wants to heal us from our wounds and put on his ways of dealing with life (Ephesians 4:22-24). Pornography is a false way to intimacy that only God can fully satisfy.

We need to face our brokenness. This takes courage and desperation. We may need to revisit our childhoods and reflect on the messages we had trained into us about how life worked. Sometimes we will realize we have been radically molded differently from God’s ways. If we have been trained to please others to be safe, we may spend the rest of our lives trying to live other people’s expectations instead of being true to ourselves and living the life God has planned.

But we will need to work at it. Learning and using the Word of God, depending on the Holy Spirit, and practicing spiritual disciplines can be helpful in cooperating with God in our transformation.

The bottom line in avoiding becoming crippled is a healthy heart. “Watch over your heart with all diligence for from it flow the springs of life” (Proverbs 4:23, NAS). Knowing the Word only and not practicing it, depending on ourselves only and not the Holy Spirit, and practicing the spiritual disciplines as a way to grow ourselves will fail to change us. Only God can do this. He will use the Word, the Spirit, and the disciplines we know and practice to transform us.

We can be healed of our wounds so they don’t cripple us. But we need to count the cost. Are we willing to fight the battle with the world, the flesh and the devil to be healed? Or do we want to take the worldly path and miss the supernatural one God offers us as we heal? I choose health over being crippled.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Spiritual Formation | Leave a Comment »

Why Feelings Are Important

May 17, 2018 by journeyintolight

If we think getting a physical examination is a smart thing to do, we will have little fear of getting one. However, if we view it as a means to discover something seriously wrong and suspect there may be, we can become terrified. The same situation can generate peace or fear depending on how we think about it.

However, to be focused on our thinking without paying attention to our feelings is to risk having a distorted view of reality. God uses both to communicate with us. Ignoring either one can get us into trouble because our thoughts influence our feelings and vi-se-versa.

In decision-making, both should be used. I use rational thinking to help determine the right way, but I also use my emotions to discern God’s path. “All his paths are peace” (Proverbs 3:17), meaning I will feel peace as I head in God’s direction.

We may choose to ignore our feelings because they are sometimes unreliable in telling us the truth about life. But they do tell us about ourselves and what we truly believe in our hearts. We miss knowing our hearts when we ignore our feelings and then fail to “watch over our hearts with all diligence for from it flow the springs of life” (Proverbs 4:23).

image

Knowing Scripture is a good first step in living in the reality of God’s peace and strength. However, we don’t always believe the Scripture we know. Our feelings often reflect this. We can use our feelings to exam what we are believing in our hearts and work with God in changing them if they need it.

Our fears often show we don’t trust God is the Good Shepherd in guiding, comforting, and protecting us. We can be terrified as we face the day. We think we are alone with many challenges and potentials to be hurt.

Yet, God is always there. He is quietly watching to give us strength to get through each day. But our feelings sometimes drag down our beliefs about God because we let our fears dictate our thinking this is a dangerous world without help.

Some of the thoughts in our hearts have been put there by Satan. As Jesus used memorized Scripture to beat Satan, we must do the same in fighting back against the lies within us (Matthew 4:1-10).

I spent many years ignoring my feelings. In my childhood home, I was afraid to experience them because I could lose control and risk physical and emotional abuse. In engineering school, I was also taught to ignore feelings because they could cloud my objectivity.

Only in recent years have I realized feelings are important. They reveal my heart which is necessary to draw closer to God. We need to acknowledge feelings so they can be processed which reduces their intensity. To ignore them can create physical and emotional damage.

May we learn feeling at peace requires positive thinking. “Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise… Then the God of peace will be with you” (Philippians 4:8-9, NLT).

Feelings are important. They are a gift from God. May we learn to experience God through them.

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Feelings | Leave a Comment »

Thinking Positive About Life

April 25, 2018 by journeyintolight

How we view a problem determines what we feel about it. For example, if we think an eye discomfort is a serious problem that will only get worse, we feel fearful. However, if we view it as a “nothing burger,” a minor nuisance that most people learn to live with without complaint, we feel peace. This is the same problem with two dramatically different emotional reactions to it based on how we perceive the problem. So, how do we think positive and accurately about our problems? Or how can we look at our problems with God’s perspective?

image.png

We need to be intentional in gaining God’s perspective on our problems. For example, God’s perspective on a difficult time is for us to respond with rejoicing. Why?  Because the trial is intended to help us grow spiritually (James 1:2-4).

Is that your perspective on hard times? It’s not mine either. I want the problem to go away before rejoicing. A practical exercise I have done for years is to apply memorized verses to various situations throughout the day. It’s amazing how this helps me to think more positive. I say to myself, What is God saying to me in this moment through this verse? Life seems more positive after doing this.

We often have negative thinking already programmed in our minds, such as expecting worst-case scenarios. In addition, Satan can bombard us with lies that are designed to keep us from thinking positive. We need to tune into our thoughts to determine if this is happening. This can help us insure our thoughts are true, right and admirable (Philippians 4:8).

For me, this requires a couple of 15-minute breaks a day to connect to God and my thoughts and feelings. If they aren’t from God’s perspective, I experience the negative feelings, release them, and exam the thoughts driving those feelings. I then ask God to help me to dwell on his perspective and reject the negative thinking.

We think about what we focus on. If we focus on five hours of TV a day, and work 60 hours a week it will be hard to see life from God’s perspective. Without reading, mediating, hearing and applying the Bible to get the Word into our hearts, we will not think positive because we live in a negative world.

We can also ask God to guard our thoughts and minds from negative thoughts (Philippians 4:6-7). We can daily ask the Holy Spirit to reveal any hurtful thoughts we have (Psalm 139:23-24). And when we discover them, claim the Holy Spirit’s power to replace them with God’s truth (Ephesians 4:22-24).

Finally, remembering who we are to God helps us to think positive. He is always with us and promises to help us through every situation. He is the Good Shepherd and is always watching out for us. He also loves us enough to have died for us. We never need to prove anything to him because He already loves, values, and accepts us completely. Nothing will ever change that.

I hope practicing some of these actions will enable you to think more positive. Remember, my friend, “these sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared to the glory that is to be revealed to us” (Romans 8:18). Look at life from this perspective and think positive.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Vision | Leave a Comment »

Be Still

March 29, 2018 by journeyintolight

I felt stressed experiencing the ravages of a bad cold and the discomfort of an eye affliction. My heart was not still. I wanted to get out of my suffering as quickly as possible, but wasn’t sure it would happen soon. This upset me.

Then, God spoke to me through Psalm 37:7. He said, “Stop stressing about your health. Rest in Me. I am healing you, but it will take some time. Meanwhile, I want you to wait patiently for Me.”

I then realized how unstill I was, being anxious and worried about so much. God reminded me I wasn’t alone in seeking deliverance. He was also involved working a healing.

He made good on his promise by healing my cold within two days. I can’t recall ever healing that fast from a bad cold. My eye has gotten better but am still waiting patiently for further healing. His healing may be total, partial, or strengthening me to endure it better.

I typically don’t stay in touch with my emotions. I can be upset and feeling despair and ignore it. However, the other night alarming thoughts lodged in my mind and heart. At the first chance, I tried to identify what thoughts had caused me not to be still. As I tuned into my self-talk, this is what I heard,” Your eye affliction is never going to go away and it will make your life miserable”.

I then challenged the thoughts by countering with the truth. My self-talk included, “This discomfort is not going to kill me. I have had chronic pain many times before and God has always delivered. Why wouldn’t he this time? “I (God) am with you and will help and strengthen you.” I (God) will sustain you and make you a stronger Christian through this trial.” After a few minutes of this kind of self-talk my soul returned to a state of stillness. It helped me to accept the reality of God’s presence and protection and helped clear away unbelief that blocked relying on him.

Being still is a matter of rising above circumstances. Jesus challenged the disciples to be still when the storm screamed at them they were going to die. “The disciples went and woke him up, shouting, “Master, Master, we’re going to drown!”

“When Jesus woke up, he rebuked the wind and the raging waves. Suddenly the storm stopped and all was calm.  Then he asked them, “Where is your faith?” (Luke 8:24-25, NLT).

Jesus also tells his disciples, “Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world” (John 16:33, NLT). We don’t overcome by having controllable circumstances, but through Jesus’ powerful interventions as we trust in his presence and help.

May we learn to be still and rest in his care and protection. May God increase our faith as we are “destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and … taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5, NAS). May we tune into our self-talk and capture the lies that upset us so much and replace them with God’s peace-generating truths.

Be still my friend. You are safe.

Posted in Feelings | Leave a Comment »

Life is Scary-But It Doesn’t Have to Be

February 26, 2018 by journeyintolight

I was scared as I opened the letter from the doctor’s office. I thought I was getting the results of my CT Scan that would show if I had developed any new aneurisms in the past year. I was scared for it could involve more surgery or worse.

I had just read that day the way to overcome the “What ifs?” is to replace them with “So, whats?” The belief behind this statement is God works all things for our good (Romans 8:28-29). As I nervously tore open the letter, I kept repeating “So what, So what?”. I was hoping my anxiety level would be no higher than level 3, but it was closer to a 7 out of 10. It turned out not to be the report on the scan results but a change of appointment. I felt both relief and disappointment.

I spent a few minutes pondering what had just happened. I concluded I believed hearing the scan results merited a mild anxious reaction. However, my heart believed this event was a clear and present danger. My head believed if the results were bad and I would die I will go to heaven and it would be wonderful forever. I also believed if I had to go through another operation, God would give me the strength to endure.

However, my belief in my heart was different. If I were to die, it would be bad. Why? Perhaps it was a belief from childhood that death is the end of all pleasure. I also feared the possible pain would be overwhelming and my life would be miserable. No wonder I was so scared. I told the Lord we had some work to do to bring my heart beliefs into alignment with my head.

What we deeply believe largely influences our feelings- and our feelings influence our beliefs. We can’t ignore either one. We often downplay the feeling side of faith. We focus on right beliefs and don’t pay much attention to what our hearts depends on. This frequently comes to us through our screaming emotions.

So, if very afraid, we need to look at our beliefs.

  • If afraid of losing our jobs, perhaps we believe we are the provider and not God.
  • If fearful of displeasing a leader, maybe we believe our security and worth are determined by what the boss thinks and not by God.
  • If afraid of the future, we may be trusting in controlling the future and not in God doing it.

We change our feelings by changing what we trust in. Do we rely on lies or truth? We need God’s help to detect and let go of the lies many of us have clung to since childhood and embrace God’s loving presence that gives us peace and security (Psalm 139:23-24).

What is one thing you are fearing today? Ask God to help you discern what you are believing that is driving your anxiety. If it’s a lie, then ask him to help you rely on the truth. Even if it is the truth, claim his promise to “be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your request be known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7, NAS).

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted in Prayer | Leave a Comment »

« Newer Posts - Older Posts »